Our Testimony!
Before, I left for Kenya, Africa early November of 2018, I knew that God wanted me to marry Susan. Many people say or ask, how did you know that Susan was the person you were supposed to marry? i tell them, I just knew in my spirit. At the time, I had developed such a great love soon after I was introduced to her, it is unexplainable.
A journey of faith is a life of ongoing dependence on God. It is a journey of thanksgiving, of praising God for providing joy and abundant love continually. For providing his steadfast presence even in the times of sorrow, despair, and fear.
Truthfully, like any long journey, the road is difficult to predict. I like to visualize my faith journey like a long road. We had to understand this as a couple. That regardless of miles that separated Susan and I, if we made God’s presence the center of our marriage, we would be okay.
The obstacles and how we overcame them
After our day of wedding (marriage) Susan and I remained apart for 3 years. This was not by choice but because we had to allow the process of paperwork for her to join me in the United States to materialize legally. In the year 2020, the Corona virus – pandemic made things even harder not only for our paperwork to be concluded but for me to travel to Kenya to see her. I remember, we did not see each other the whole year of 2020.
Even though we communicated a lot and sometimes calling each other 3 to 4 times a day, we still longed to be with each other as a couple. Just imagine 3 years – with a minimum of 3,000 long distance phone calls. Yet every time we talked, we felt God’s presence right there with us. We noticed that our love for each other miraculously increased instead of decreasing. In the last week of November of 2021, the immigration paperwork was completed, and she was able to join me here in the United States on December 5th, 2021 – Glory be to God.
Susan and I were reminded often by Holy Spirit, that our God is omnipresent. Omnipresence means all-present. This term means that God is capable of being everywhere at the same time. There is no location where he does not inhabit.
When each one of us were faced with challenges, we would remember the following three Scriptures
- Proverbs 15:3 – The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
- Deuteronomy 31:6 – Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.
- Isaiah 43:2 – When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee
Ladies and Gentlemen, when we remember that God is in our life’s, all the Bible verses about how to treat each other take on an added importance: “Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21) regardless of obstacles.
When God said in Colossians 3:19 “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them”. It took an added significance to me especially in knowing that God is watching everything I do – including my motives every time I spoke to my wife on the phone.
Being more aware of God’s presence has led me to focus on having a more God-ordered marriage. With God as the center of our relationship, we now enjoy our life lots more a husband and wife.
We can only love in such cases through God’s help
By putting God at the center of my marriage, I was and now able to enlist His help to love. God doesn’t give me an impossible list of things to do as husband and then say, “Go do it.” NO, He says, “Let Me love your wife through you.” I now realized that God’s help was available to help me every step of the way.
Just before Apostle Paul lays out how husbands are to love their wives and how wives are to love their husbands, he wrote in (Ephesians 5:18), “Be filled with the Spirit.” A fuller translation of the Greek would be, “Let yourself be continually filled with the Spirit.”
God knows that on our own we can’t love the way He calls us to love. He wants for us to go to Him, lean on Him and learn to let His power flow through our sinful hearts and minds so that we can be the kind of people who excel in love that others take notice (see John 13:34-35).
Why do we try everything else including arguing with each other and then go to God as a last resort?
Because we do NOT fully trust our Heavenly Father. Over the years now, I have learnt to talk things through with God first to get His perspective before I talk them through with my wife. I’ve learned to depend on His strength. Sometimes I have to pray, “Lord, help me to care about this; I know it’s important to my wife, but in my apathy it’s just not that important to me.”
Seeing your spouse is God’s chosen daughter or son
In applying myself to love my wife as God’s daughter, God makes himself more real to me every day and vise versa. He answers our prayers when we look unto him for help. He gives us His strength. He offers His perspective. He gives us hope, conviction, encouragement and counsel. The more we invite God into our life and marriage, the more real He becomes to us.
This may be especially true if you’re in a difficult season of marriage. When things are easy, you may not feel the need for God so strongly. But when you know you just don’t have what it takes, God is far more than a distant friend; He becomes your only hope. And with a God like ours, leaning on Him as your only hope is a very safe and certain thing to do.
Whenever I ask God to help me affirm and encourage my wife, God is good at reminding me of things I’ve forgotten. If you are a husband, remember, your wife is God’s daughter who needs to be treated with honor and respect. God wants His daughter to be cherished.
When you put God’s Word at the center of your marriage, the Scriptures will find a way into your heart, not just your mind, but in your heart. When your spouse does the same, he or she will regularly go to God to receive His strength to love you even more and will open up to be a conduit of God’s love.
When the apostle John wrote in 1 John 4:19 “We love because he first loved us” he was implying that without acknowledging the love of God (agape love) we may not be as motivated or even capable of loving others.
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